Cravings
I'm having one of those kinds of days again. Not bad exactly, but not good. I feel lonely and anxious and today I wish I was normal. The sun didn't come out today and it won't come out tomorrow. I have to wait until Thursday.
I think I may have a major issue with light. I bought some full spectrum light bulbs yesterday and I've enjoyed them in my room, but it's still not enough brightness for me. I think that I need to get a light box prescribed for me. But I don't know if it will be enough. I just want spring to be here!
To feel the sunlight on my face, to bask in it's warmth, to feel my insides glow are the sensations that I'm aching to feel. I want the darkness to abate. I crave happiness. It's been so long since I felt true ecstasy during mundane daily life. I just want to be happy! Is that such a sin?
A girl. Exploring the world of Bipolar Disorder one day at a time. Informing and educating the public about mental illness.
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© 2009 Cristina C. Fender
