Still Grieving
I went to the in-laws for Halloween. The kids had a wonderful time spending time with their cousins and grandparents. On the way back we stopped by my cousin's house. She'd been to the valley within the last couple of weeks and my stepmother gave her some things that I wanted that had been my father's. I got his gray cowboy boots and an old briefcase that my father had carried that had once been my grandfather's.
I promptly went to bed when I got home. I was exhausted. When I woke up the house was quiet since my husband had taken my daughter to the store. I carefully unwrapped my father's boots and then I began crying. He's never coming back. The only way I would've gotten those boots is because he is dead. It all came back to me. How much I miss him...how much I wish this wasn't happening...how much I wish I could make all this pain go away.
I'm still grieving. I wish I could make the process go faster. I don't think that I will ever stop missing my father. He was my best friend and I could always go to him when I needed him. I still have the urge to call him. I look at my phone and then I remember he's not there.
About the Author: Cristina C. Fender, 34, is rapidly becoming an expert on Bipolar Disorder. She has been researching Bipolar Disorder and blogging about her own experiences for several years. At age 21 she was diagnosed with depression and saw psychiatrists for over ten years before she was correctly diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder I. Her vision for writing at Raw Writing for the Real World of Bipolar is to inform and educate the public about mental illness. Feel free to Email Cristina a comment or a question.Click here to Subscribe in a Reader.
© 2009 Cristina C. Fender
