Raw Writing for the Real World of Bipolar

There's a lot of debate out there about whether or not one should take medications for Bipolar Disorder. I've heard from a few people that they're off their medications and they feel that works for them. Then there are people who couldn't function without medications.

It also depends on whether or not the diagnosis is correct. It can often take years to be correctly diagnosed as Bipolar. In the meantime you may be diagnosed as having Unipolar Depression. If you have unipolar depression then you may be able to be off your medications for a while or permanently. If the depression is reoccurring then you'll probably have to be on medications permanently.

Bipolar Disorder, if properly diagnosed, is not something that can easily controlled without medication. If you can control your symptoms while being medication free it is possible that you only have cyclomythia, a light form of Bipolar Disorder. If you have Bipolar I or II, You will need to be medicated if you want to be symptom free or even close to normal. Rapid cycling, alternating between cycles of depression and mania in one day, one week or one month, is hard to control without medication.

There is evidence that, should you choose to remain medication free, that your disorder will worsen with time. Your episodes of mania and depression will occur more frequently and more forcefully. Bipolar Disorder will never simply go away. You can choose to control it with medication or you can choose to live with it. This is a decision that only you can make. Do you mind that your disorder disrupts your lifestyle?

Bipolar Disorder can be a debilitating disease. I'm pro-medication because I choose to want to live my life without pain. That doesn't mean that medication will make it all go away. For me, it simply dulls the cycles of mania and depression. My behavior is much less erratic with medication. Cycles of mania, depression, and psychotic episodes are much less infrequent with proper medication.

That being said, it can often take years to find the correct medication to control your illness. I've tried Seroquel, Zyprexa, Lamictal, and Lithium along with antipsychotics like Abilify, Risperadal, and Geodon. I found that Lithium and Geodon works the best for me, but it may not be the same for you. Then you have to find the correct dosage that works for you. I've been on Lithium and Geodon for over a year and I still find that the dosage need periodic tweaking.

Then there are the side effects to consider. Everything from sleepiness to insomnia to eating more or less to shakiness can be yours for the price of these medications. Are they worth putting up with? That all depends on you. I found the side effects of Seroquel, Zyprexa and Lamictal to be too great to put up with, especially since they didn't seem to affect my disorder much. I shake due to taking Lithium. I've contemplated going off the medication, but I just can't do it. It works. It's been the only thing that's worked and there are just not enough mood stabilizers to go around. It comes down to whether or not I feel compelled to take medication to stabilize my disorder.

Do I want to live a normal life or be on disability for the rest of my life? Hence, I choose the medication. I've lowered the dosage to decrease my shakiness. If I begin cycling up and down then I probably will increase the medication again. It's the choice I have to make. Do I enjoy the shakes? No. Do I enjoy regular life with my family? Yes. Only you can decide what's right for you and never let anyone tell you differently. This is your only chance at life. You need to decide if medication is right for you.


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© 2009 Cristina Fender